In pursuit of my hidden six-pack abs

"Where art thou, my hidden pride? Where art thou?"

If I remember correctly, my initiative of developing a six-pack abs started eons ago. It involved me looking into the mirror while getting topless (now now, ladies, control your urges please!) and cursing myself, for having allowed the stubborn flab to juxtapose itself next to my inherent stomach muscles, while taking control of it. This was (or rather, still is) a major flaw in my otherwise Greek God like physique (You think I'm joking???).

Now, when I use words like hidden and inherent in my post, it obviously means that I was in possession of   the six-pack earlier... but when you read--- my initiative of developing a six-pack abs started eons ago--- you may be left wondering as to which period of my life I actually had the packs. Well this was the time when yours truly was in school and pre-degree (especially while I was practicing yoga under my father's guidance). If any of you have gone through my earlier posts, the more brilliant and mentally proactive ones among you would have probably realised that I hail from a family that specialises in yoga. Practicing this discipline from a tender age of five meant that my stomach muscles were automatically put to work, without even me noticing the transformation or voluntarily being a part of the process.

So, when did this repulsive and nefarious thing called flab start taking over the muscle you may ask? It happened during the summer of 2005, when I had just finished my final exams and was looking forward to jaunt across the country for the next two months. Believe me, when I left Bangalore, I was an emaciated bloke (the kind who could count the number of bones in his body) who was just hovering around sixty kilos, but when it was time for me to get back to college, I turned a healthy 69 (I love this number for the exact reason that you're grinning so wryly for). Nine kilos in two months was the biggest physical transformation in my entire life until date (for someone who had been skinny throughout his life). My friends in college were taken aback the very moment I entered my classroom. I was overjoyed. Peace! End of story.

Wait a minute... If you thought the post would end on such an abrupt note and make you, the reader, infer that it is one of those happy endings stories, YOU ARE MISTAKEN. The story just begins here my friend.

While the metamorphosis continued to amaze me and others equally, yet again there was a small department in my body that I completely forgot about (you must have guessed it by now). For some reason, good (remember the yoga days?) or bad (now), I've always neglected this part of the body in the process of building the rest. I even clearly remember the day when I first hit the gym (somewhere in November 2005), I was all up for bulking up my newly found physique. Now that the genes I inherited from my dad was finally showing itself (my dad was a nationally acclaimed amateur bodybuilding champion), I wanted to be like him so badly, like there is no tomorrow.

Thus, I started working out earnestly. It included doing a lot of ground exercises, warm-ups, lifting heavy weights for each body part, etc. but at the same time, spending only 5-10 minutes towards my 6-pack development. In fact, I used to enjoy all the attention that my body attracted. Flaunting those 16.5 inch arms, removing my t-shirt in the gym after the workout, hitting out various poses, flexing my muscles etc. gave me a high (my God! What a showoff). Showing off was only a small part of it. The major cause was to show all those guys who didn't believe in me, or who kept calling me skinny or a bag of bones, that I had done it and become the way I am. You may call it retribution... My way.

It was only when people started pointing towards the rather conspicuous and preposterous belly of mine (oops! The small department had grown to a big one by now) that I started giving it some more attention. By the time yours truly gave this department it's well deserved space, it was too late. When I say too late it means that the exercises that I was doing after my regular workouts weren't enough to help reduce it. If you think that was bad enough, then listen to this... My MBA exams were approaching and I had to quit the gym for a short while (at least that's what I thought), but this short while turned out to be a long six months and at the end of it  I was already looking six months pregnant (have you ever heard of a word called 'exaggeration'?). My lifestyle had changed completely. Eating, sleeping, and watching movies were the only mentionable daily activities in this phase. So, like Issac Newton said in one of his laws that "Every action has an equal and opposite reaction,"  in my case, the opposite reaction was MORE than equal to the action. A lot of comments started flowing. Here, I quote a few

• "Monae look at your stomach protruding out. I never had such a thing when I was of your age"
• "Arjun, what is this? You no longer look like the Greek God because of this"
• "Your body is damn good but I feel your tummy needs a little tuck as it seems to be getting more attention now"
• "Boy you need to literally slog your ass off to reduce that thing"
• "At least I don't have a pot belly"
• "You need to do 200 crunches followed by 200 leg raises followed by 100 hyper-extensions, followed by a zillion this, followed by a zillion that, etc etc. everyday"

In a way I must thank my critics, for their critique got the energy juices flowing in me. I started going for my daily morning jog, which was followed by an oil massage by my brother (who happens to be doing his graduation in Ayurveda). I even started running on the beach every morning, followed by a hardcore abdominal workout for the two weeks I spent in Kerala. The results were instantaneous. I was beginning to feel proud of my body once again (so what if it is only a 4-pack as of now???).

So it sort of has an happy ending after all. Doesn't it? :)

Moral(s):

• You can't get a body like the jockey-underwear-ad-guy without slogging your ass (read abdominal muscles) off. 
• No pain, no gain.
• Rome (read 'a great six-pack') was not built in a day.
• Consistency is the key. You can't afford to be like the Indian cricket team with your body. 
• Smugness screws up everything.